9 Of the Best Ways to Find Balance in Your Life In 2022
All of us have a way in which we act or react to life situations. We may not be aware of it, but most of the time we act a certain way in situations because we aren’t aware of how much is at stake. There are times when we react emotionally because we lack clarity on the situation and allow an emotional response to take over our decision-making for a moment in time. When we consider becoming the best version of ourselves, we need to consider how we act.
We need to find balance in our lives always, but especially in our responses. The way we respond to others is critical if we want to create conditions for healthy relationships. Balance says a lot about our character, who we are now, and who we are becoming. Think about people in your life who seem to have things together. Take a second to think about those people in life who can connect with others in a way we cannot. It’s important to think about the characteristics they have which make their connection with others possible. Some examples of this would be calm, good eye contact, centered, firm, knowing when to listen, and knowing when to talk. They have integrity, patience, endurance, flexibility, an open mind, compassion, and many more characteristics.
When you think of balance think of a line. You can even draw a line on a piece of paper if you need a visual. The left end of the line will be “passive” and the right side of the line being “aggressive.” The center of the line represents balance or assertiveness. Passive people tend to be those who underreact to situations in life. They let things go; they just don’t respond and/or minimize what’s happening in front of them. Aggressive people are those that tend to overreact in life. They may blow things out of proportion and/or maximize what’s going on in front of them. Those in the middle who are assertive react to the situation with just the right amount of energy. They are not overbearing or wishy-washy. They are the ones that are firm, calm, and give good eye contact. Moreover, they are polished and easily relate to others. They have the strength and convey confidence that others may succeed. They’re the ones that make solid, responsible decisions for themselves and those they serve. They see those interactions as opportunities to serve others. The reality is they make these decisions based on a deeper understanding and compassion for others as their driving force. The outcome is mutual respect and a successful connection.
Finding balance is Thinking Deeply Self-Critically and being able to identify where you are on that line and push yourself toward balance. Let’s say you’re a passive person. You fall somewhere between passive and balanced. You will have to push yourself out of your box and comfort zone to achieve balance. If you are on the other side of the line somewhere between balance and aggressiveness you are going to have to pull back or reel yourself in. Be mindful, there is always room for improvement. I am not sure there is truly anyone that is completely balanced we can all always grow in some area of our lives, and we need to continue to grow as a service to others around us. As I stated before there are many different characteristics that we need to consider helping us become more balanced. These are just a handful of the ones that will work over and over again if we allow them to.
1 We must have Integrity.
Doing what you say you are going to do goes a long way with others. Integrity creates many conditions. It reinforces dependability. It helps cultivate a connection with others. When people can count on you, relationships are enhanced. Integrity gives a genuine sense of pride and ownership of responsibility. When you are taking responsibility for yourself you gain a sense of peace and calm which reinforces balance in your life and reduces stress.
2 You must have Patience.
Sometimes when communicating with others our patience becomes thin. Finding balance in your life takes patience with others. Often, we have many errors in our thoughts one of which is immediate gratification. We need things done and we need them done now. Relationships take time to build momentum and cultivate into something meaningful. When we challenge ourselves to be patient and open our minds to what is happening in front of us we start to see the bigger picture. When we start to connect the dots of this bigger picture, we begin to gain more compassion for what is going on. With more compassion, we can again gain a sense of peace and calm about the situation which reinforces balance.
3 You must have Mental Endurance
Finding balance takes a good deal of thinking and mental endurance. It’s trial and error. We may not have the answer right away and we must also consider that we may never get the right answer (mindfulness). Mental Endurance is about being able to read situations and adapt or flow with them. If we try a certain response and it doesn’t work, we owe it to ourselves and others to try something else. With balance, giving up or failing isn’t an option. Mental endurance is seeing things through to the end. Once you are at the end it’s about evaluating if what you did was good enough or if there is something else that needs to be done. Mental endurance is about pushing yourself from being passive or aggressive. It’s about challenging yourself to use your internal strength to find your balance. Finding your mental endurance is an extremely profound idea/concept and even harder to achieve. We are all at different places in our lives due to our life experiences and this is going to look different for each one of us.
4 You must keep an Open Mind
Being in the helping field for over 20 years having an open channel of communication with relationships is a staple in our personal change process. For any change to happen, we need to first be open to the idea that something needs to be changed. In any situation in our lives, there are hundreds of opportunities to be open-minded. We get stuck in our stubborn ideas, biases, judgments, attitudes, values, and beliefs. Don’t get this wrong we get stuck in our reality. Working with others we must be open-minded to the idea that they have their realities which we truly know nothing about. Balance is about exploring their realities and finding a way to meet them where there are. If you want to become the best version of yourself this process isn’t about meeting someone in the middle, it’s meeting them where they are. I wrote that twice because it’s vital to understand. Again, this is a profound concept but to find your balance you must be open to the possibility that you are wrong. Once this can be achieved defenses tend to drop and learning and deeper understanding begin to take over.
5 You must find Compassion for others and their circumstances
Balance can be achieved through having compassion for others. Compassion is a simple word but it’s complex when trying to manifest it. Compassion can be attained by constantly seeking clarity. Before we react to a situation, we need more information. Asking questions to gain more information and understanding increases our clarity. Sometimes it takes a good deal of mental endurance to see the picture for what it is. Gaining information about a situation gives us competence. It helps us become more of an expert (use that word loosely). I don’t think we will ever be an expert on another person’s life and if we think we are, then we have bigger problems, we have lost sight somewhere along the way. Having more competence about a situation will allow us to feel compassion for what is happening. When we feel compassion, we can connect more meaningfully with those around us. In gaining compassion for others we can begin to cultivate balance.
6 You must seek clarity in every situation
As stated in the above section you must constantly seek clarity. Clarity is vital to have deep meaningful relationships and it’s vital to finding balance in your life. Whenever there is tension frustration or some other type of uncomfortable feeling it is typically a result of a lack of clarity. Seeking clarity helps us to navigate this life and the adversity that comes with it. If you are interested in a deeper understanding of Clarity please check out this other article. Clarity is one of the Foundational Pieces of Thinking Deeply Self-Critically.
7 You must use Mindfulness all the time
When I use the term mindfulness what I mean is we need to consider the possibilities that we are wrong. Once we do that our defenses will go down and we can allow new information into our thinking. Human behavior isn’t an exact science it’s not about being right or wrong all the time. To be human and socialize is to make mistakes. Allowing possibilities of us being wrong in our thinking will help us to see the bigger picture. Seeing a more whole picture cultivates more peace and calmness about what is going on. That peace and calmness allow us to experience a feeling of balance. As I continue to state this is a profound concept and hard to articulate. What I know and have experienced is that the more mindful I am about situations the more my balance comes into view. If you would like to gain more insight into Mindfulness please check out the other article I wrote on it. Mindfulness is one of the Foundational Pieces of Thinking Deeply Self-Critically.
8 You must create new conditions and fix old conditions
Considering how your actions have an impact on others plays a role in your balance as a person. We all affect people in our lives. We all create certain conditions that are likely still impacting those around us. It’s important to stay aware of our actions so we can minimize the harm that we do to others. Not only must we create new conditions, but we must mend old conditions that have been broken. Once again this is one of the Foundations to Thinking Deeply Self-Critically if you want to dig deeper into this please check out the article on Creating Conditions.
9 You must Instill Hope
All of us need a lifeline; we need meaningful connections with others. Through my lens life is about serving others around us. It’s about doing what we can to become the best version of ourselves and giving back to the world around us. One way we do this is by instilling hope in others in our lives, whether it be family, friends, co-workers, or someone we just met. When we give hope away it does something to us internally. It reinforces balance. In a larger sense, it combats some of the negativity that sometimes consumes us day to day. Instilling Hope is one of the Foundations of Thinking Deeply Self-Critically if you would like more about it as it pertains to becoming the best version of yourself please check out the article Instilling Hope.
Conclusion
Balance is critical if we want to have meaningful relationships and become the best version of ourselves. This balance is not something that can be achieved without work. Balance takes integrity, patience, mental endurance, and an open mind. Balance also takes a great deal of compassion for others and the situations around us.
We can come closer to balance when we focus on the Foundations of Thinking Deeply Self-Critically which are Instilling Hope, Clarity, Creating Conditions, and Mindfulness. Having balance in our lives will bring us closer to the best version of ourselves and it will have a positive impact on those in our lives in ways we never thought possible.
If you like what you have read, check out other articles on the website ThinkingDeeplySelf-Critically.com the site is designed to give us tools and techniques to help us become the best version of ourselves. There are four main categories on the site. The Foundation, Our Responsibility to Us, Our Responsibility to Others and Facilitating Crisis. We can also be found on Pinterest.
The above books are recommended reading to really begin digging deep into our minds and understand why we do what we do. They are affiliate links through amazon. So, by clicking on them you will be directed to amazon. As always thank you for checking out the website.
